For most of us, the questions “honey can you pick up some milk?” and “hey did you finish that slide deck?” usually are not asked to the same person. For couples who are both independents, however, this kind of context switching is just a normal part of everyday life.
We sat down with a handful of freelance couples to get to the bottom of what it’s like being paired off with a fellow freelancer. What we found out might surprise you!
In this article we’ll delve into the following:
Clearing the housing hurdle
When looking for a new tenant, many landlords in European cities still consider a permanent job contract as the holy grail. In Paris, you may have to prove you consistently earn at least three times the rent to secure an apartment. Marion Giroudon, Freelancing Mentor and Digital Strategy Consultant, explains that she was already freelancing when she and her wife tried to rent an apartment in France - but her wife still had a permanent job - and not both having permanent job contracts raised a few eyebrows from potential landlords. “The question of housing, in France, can be quite complex,” comments Asli Ciyow, Gender Equality and Intercultural Trainer, who has lived in a number of countries but has settled in Marseille with her partner Nassim Merzouk, Business Developer and Consultant working on impact projects.
So what’s the secret to securing a lease in France? “When we finally found our first apartment in Limoges, the landlord was an entrepreneur himself,” explains Nassim. For Marion and her wife, the story is similar: “We focused our search on for-rent-by-owner websites like PAP.fr, and finally found a rental with an independent owner - who wasn’t afraid of our status as freelancers.”
Across borders, however, access to housing can actually be easier - Marion and her wife relocated to Spain a few years ago and thankfully, they haven’t had an issue there: “Renting a place and, later on, buying a house were no problem for us as two independents.”
Raffaella Prati, Italian Translator & Localization Expert whose husband is an independent psychotherapist, is also based in Spain echoes this same sentiment: “I had no problem renting my flat in Madrid; I had a steady income and provided all the necessary documents to prove my financial stability.” Later on, when she and her husband relocated to a smaller town on the northern coast of Spain, “we rented an apartment that we’ve stayed at for years while on vacation. The people there have known us for many years, so signing a contract with them was not a problem at all — they were actually very happy to have us!”
Sharing office space
When your home is your headquarters, creating dedicated spaces allows both your professional and personal lives to thrive side-by-side. Speaking with Marion on YouTube, independent Marketing and SEA Expert Marine Lecart explained that while she and her husband run their own business together, they aren’t physically together 24/7 - one or the other is often out for client visits or other errands. “People find it funny, but we have dedicated touch points throughout the week - almost like team meetings. That way, we don’t end up talking about work all the time. There’s a dedicated time for that.”
But how about physically sharing an office? When we asked this question to Asli and Nassim, their answer was “not anymore!” Nassim now rents out a desk in a coworking space, while Asli has her office setup at home. For Marion and her wife, separate offices was a deal breaker when looking for a new house: “It was a very important part of our search criteria!” Raffaella and her husband did the same - but partially out of necessity, since his work as a psychotherapist requires the utmost privacy.
We’ve reported recently that many freelancers report regularly fighting loneliness - and Marion explains that it’s nice having “someone else in the house - to ask questions, submit ideas, and rant when we’re dealing with an annoying situation, just like we’d do with a coworker.” Raffaella says her husband “often comes by my office to chat, ask what he should make for dinner, share some news, or tease the cat.”
Money management
Managing finances together presents an opportunity for freelancer couples to build a solid system - using their creativity to put structure in place while respecting the natural ebb and flow of a freelancer’s business development. .
The concept of the “breadwinner” doesn’t really exist for these couples - many of whom report fluctuating incomes, like Marion who explains “the tables have already turned a few times throughout the course of our relationship.” To make it easy to manage the balance sheet, they split monthly expenses 50/50 - but for bigger expenses (vacations, wedding, IVF, house down payment, home improvements) the higher earner at the time is the one who contributes more.
For Marine and her husband, on the other hand, they run their business together and split everything 50/50. “We don’t have to negotiate our salaries with each other,” she explains with a laugh.
Coupling off later in life, however, meant that Rafaella and her husband already had a fairly established financial life before settling down together. "We have a spreadsheet where we record our joint expenses, such as rent and groceries," she says. "We then manage our personal and professional expenses separately,” she explains, filing their income tax returns separately as well.
When kids come along
Raising children comes with its own surprises - like sickness and strike days at daycare or school. So who picks up the slack? Marine says: “For us, it depends on the business impact - the person who will take care of the sick kid is the one who can more easily reschedule their task for the day.”
Asli and Nassim admit that even before their son was born, they had a calendar management system “equivalent to that of a head of state…” When he was a baby, they would often go on family business trips to accompany Asli - who frequently travels for work as a professional trainer. “He loves taking the train as a result,” says Nassim. Now that he’s in school, “we needed a new color code for the shared calendar,” Asli explains with a laugh.
Balancing a flourishing career with family life is a rewarding puzzle that many independent couples master with flair. According to Marion, having children actually helped her enforce better boundaries: “having kids actually made the separation easier," because it forced her to work during the day and respect a hard stop when it's time for school pickup.
Leveraging Dual Freelance Power
Chalk it up to never knowing where their next paycheck will come from, but independents with successful careers are often proved to be a resilient bunch. This is why it’s no surprise that, while from the outside you might think that freelancing couples might mean double the trouble, what we’ve found is that more often than not, it’s more like double the fun! More than having an in-house coworker, it can actually be like having a true partner in crime - the real advantage is the shared understanding. As Nassim explains, “I know I can ask Asli for specific feedback based on her unique skillset, and vice-versa.”
These couples are happy to have someone at home who truly grasps the specific, often counter-intuitive realities of freelance life: the financial ebb and flow, the urgent need for boundary enforcement, and the hunt for a space that truly feels like home. They have someone to hash out complicated business issues with, someone who knows them well and can point out their strengths and weaknesses in a low-stakes manner. At the end of the day, having a partner who truly speaks your professional language doesn't just make the work easier; it makes the successes even sweeter.
